The Trust Yourself 10 Day Challenge: Day 4

How to quit overthinking everything

Melody Wilding, LMSW
3 min readOct 28, 2021


Welcome to Day 4 of the Trust Yourself Challenge!

Click here to catch up on Day 1, Day 2, and Day 3.

Yesterday we discussed how to start balancing your first STRIVE quality, Sensitivity.

Today we tackle our second STRIVE quality:


Thoughtfulness reflects your self-awareness and ability to see the nuances around you. As a Sensitive Striver, you’re exceptionally contemplative, reflective, intuitive.

But on the flip side, you can get stuck in overthinking, worrying, indecision, and doubt.

Sounds familiar? That’s because when your Thoughtfulness is unbalanced, you may:

❌ Second guess yourself and be unable to make simple decisions

❌ Be overly self-critical

❌ Get bogged down in analysis paralysis and unnecessary details

But when your Thoughtfulness is balanced, you’re able to

✔️ Think deeply and act purposefully

✔️ Practice constructive self-talk

✔️ Offer creative, innovative ideas that others miss

My client Malik is a great example of how to balance Thoughtfulness.

When we first started working together, Malik overthought everything — emails, interactions with colleagues, his value, etc.

He would replay scenarios in his head over and over. He’d think about the feedback his boss gave him and what he could’ve done differently.

But after applying many of the tactics from my new book TRUST YOURSELF, Malik was able to let go of his rumination and negative self-talk. He could work more efficiently and not get distracted by the chatter in his head.

Best of all, he got a double promotion! He skipped a level because of his increase in performance at work.

Action Step

Here are five tiny actions to move toward balancing your Thoughtfulness. Pick one and put it into practice today.

  1. Give your inner critic a name so it’s…



Melody Wilding, LMSW

Author of TRUST YOURSELF. Executive coach to Sensitive Strivers. Human behavior professor. Featured in NYT, NBC, CNN.